Shiva Shakti

The Tantric Pathway is not about sex, sensuality and a long weekend retreat getting naked

Sign up for our free webinar “Art of Tantra For Couples”  coming up on @8pm-9pm on Wednesday 3rd February 2016 AEST (Brisbane Time)

Or come along to a ‘Heart Yoga’ Tantra Workshop in BrisbaneEvery Sat night through January & Feb 2016 (except 30th Jan & 27th Feb)

Western Tantra is not Eastern Tantra

The Tantric Pathway is not just about sex and sensuality, in many ways it has nothing to do with it, but is rather a byproduct of learning deeper energetic truths about ourselves.

The word Tantra literally means book. More precisely a practical book. There are Tantra texts for many different aspects of human daily life. Sex is one of them. But here in the West we are tantalised by the taboo, so Tantra on sexuality became something secret, forbidden, aluring and of course, saleable.

Tantra has three main branches. Hindu where it began a few thousand years ago, Buddhist Tantra which it branched off into, and Jian Tantra which is the Chinese branch of Tantra which we dont hear so much about. These texts deal not just with sexuality and esoteric pathways of learning such as liberation, but all aspects of normal daily life as well.

So we could probably now call Western Tantra it’s own branch, though it focuses mainly on sexuality and sometimes on meditation, and even liberation to a lesser extent. It is definitely a bastardised form, of it. Glorified, falsified, and it is definitely more of a fashion statement where people often dabble in to look good, or get laid, or indulge themselves in polyamourous fantasy and sexual experiences.

It is worth remembering this when seeking out a Tantra workshop to be sure you know what you are really getting into, and how it is likely to be managed by the hosts and approached by the clientelle.

And I don’t say these thing negatively. If sex is what you are after then great, it is out there to be found. But if you are seeking deeper meaning, truly deeper connection with yourself, truly more authentic understanding of life, energy, and being here, then you need to look for something that probably isn’t just teaching ‘Tantra’, and finding that isn’t so easy.

If you had asked me 10 years ago how to approach learning about Tantra I would have directed you to some pretty heavyweight sexual, or life, experiences. Back then there were less people looking for it, it was harder to find, and you had to a beat a pathway to the door to get let in.

Now there is a Tantra workshop running in many cities of the world, it is easily available, and today I advise people to be more careful approaching Tantra. In our regular workshops we stick with the heart only, totally avoiding all sexual contact. We talk about sexual energy, sure, but that is so important because we really have to un-learn the bad education we have all received around our sexuality from parents, school, the media and our less than perfect relationships. And now we have to contend with sex-focused tantra workshops and overtly sexual bodywork sessions we may have experienced ‘for our own good’.

There is a lot to learn about Western Tantra before you should get anywhere near being sexual with it. It is a pathway. It is a journey and it is one that every human being would find value in taking so long as they can go at their own pace and find the true heart of Tantra beating beneath the external glitter and sexual seduction that it is being sold as.

The irony is that, yes, you will even find our advertising touting ‘Get better sex’, why? Because it captures attention of course, but when you come to a workshop or session you will be directed to work on your heart, not your sacral, sexual experience.

Sexuality is deep-end stuff, and being ready for that is often years away because of the depth of trauma and misunderstanding people have about it, and it should not be just about a long weekend retreat sandblasting your defences until you agree to do something you actually didn’t want to do because you fear the peer pressure of saying ‘no’.

Start with the Heart, learn about our energetic natures, learn theory, and work up from there. There really is no need to have sexual contact at all when learning Western Tantra, not in the beginning and not in the end. Pretty much all of the most powerful energetic Tantric experiences can be had while barely even touching another person.

At the end of the day Western Tantra should really be a pathway of learning about the deeper nature of our true selves.  Having good connection & good sex, is actually just a byproduct of that, and not the goal.

Sign up for our free webinar “Art of Tantra For Couples”  coming up on @8pm-9pm on Wednesday 3rd February 2016 AEST (Brisbane Time)

Or come along to a ‘Heart Yoga’ Tantra Workshop in BrisbaneEvery Sat night through January & Feb 2016 (except 30th Jan & 27th Feb)

The Temple Space

Mark Berry is founder and facilitator at The Temple Space. We offer supportive and complementary services in many aspects of sexual relating and communication, for people involved in the adult industry.

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